Hello I Want to Die Please Fix Me: Depression in the First Person by Anna Mehler Paperny Review

4/5 Stars 352 pages
Published August 6th 2019 by Random House Canada

Now here’s a book I’ve been trying to read since it came out. A tough subject to really read about, depression is something that has haunted almost everyone at one point. Whether it’s when you’re younger or when you’re older, whether it’s because of things you don’t think are that important or because of some kind of life changing event, it’s debilitating, and continues to be debilitating because people just don’t know that much about it, and how to treat it. And that’s really just the problem with it. It’s not that there’s something wrong with the people that have it, it’s that there’s no real sure way to treat it and get rid of it.

This book explores not only the authors own experiences with depression, but also many other people that they’ve interviewed, as well as doctors that have tried every method in the book, and in some cases trying their own forms of radical treatment to try and get rid of it in their patients, for good. Some people have good reactions to drugs that they prescribe, while others, like me, are either unresponsive or they make things worse. So the doctors turn to in patient treatment, or in a few cases, electric shock therapy, and in even fewer cases, brain surgery. But why is it so difficult to treat? Because it’s different in every person. And there’s just not enough funding or interest in getting rid of depression all together to figure out how to come up with a way to figure out a sure way to treat each and every person who has it, the first time. And that’s what the problem is.

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

Though there are a few parts in this book that were really hard for me to read, I was persistent, and I’m really glad that I was. Like my depression. I learned a lot from this book, and I think it was a really good addition to my small amount of non fiction books that I’ve read this year. I really respect the author for being able to talk about this stuff, for collection all the interviews in a book, and for putting a lot of things I’ve wondered about into words. Like how doctors sometimes seem uncaring and cold about it. How hard it is for patients to really go to the doctor and tell them that they’re thinking of, or planning on, killing themselves, because of the stigma that comes along with it. Or like how drastically different inpatient treatment is from the real world. How harsh and cold it can be. And how something that’s supposed to be making you better really can do the opposite, and cause you to not trust any doctor for the rest of your life, in some cases.

Photo by Evgenia Basyrova on Pexels.com

It took a while for me to get through this book, but mostly because there was just so much for me to process. I didn’t want to speed through it like I usually do with books, because I wanted to actually learn things from this and one day, if and when my depression comes back, I can remember this book and remember that I’m not alone, even though it feels like it. I really recommend this book to anyone who knows anyone with depression, anyone who suffers from it, and that’s really that. I recommend it to everyone. Definitely check it out if you get the chance.

If you’d like to grab a copy, you can do so here, with my link through Amazon Associates.

And if you’d like to keep up with the author, you can do so here!

Thanks for reading! Hope you’re doing well and staying safe.

Heart Attack, Vol. 1: Against the Wall by Shawn Kittelsen, Eric Zawadzki, Jon Moisan, Pat Brosseau, Mike Spicer, Michael Garland, Carina Taylor, & Andres Juarez Review

5/5 Stars 160 pages
Published August 4th 2020 by Image Comics

Do you love X-Men just as much as I do? People who have special powers each as unique as they are? What about a world where they’re segregated from the people who don’t have powers and the government demonizes them? Than this book will be perfect for you. Not only do they have their own powers, but occasionally, they can combo their powers together, creating even stronger ones. Don’t expect this book to be completely straightforward though, because there are some crazy twists in the story even I didn’t expect.

At the beginning, we see a young man and woman in an alley, making graffiti. Pretty harmless, right? Well not to everyone. Because special Variant officers come and take them down, treating the one they catch as a hardened criminal, and taking her far away and not letting her see the light of day. She’s missing, and the only person that can help her is Charlie, the young man who was with her, who secretly films the assault on Nona and uploads it for the world to see. But is he doing it for the right reasons?

Photo by Markus Spiske on Pexels.com

He then joins up with a team of women who are determined to change the world, and how people see and treat Variants, the people with powers. But it’s going to be  a long road before they get justice, and before the officers even begin to see them as people. But they’re just as much people as anyone else, most of them barely having any powers at all. The world needs to change, and they’re going to do whatever they can to do it.

Photo by Oleg Magni on Pexels.com

This book was one that I knew as soon as I started it, I was going to be obsessed with. I love the art, it’s so cartoony and amazing and it just fits the story so well, even the violent parts that aren’t so innocent. I also love the bright colours in this, as a girl with coloured hair, I always love a main character with brightly coloured hair like me. I couldn’t get enough of it. And I can’t wait to check out the next volume. Definitely check it out if you get the chance, and even if you don’t think you would love it, I think you should just try it out. I’m sure you’ll be as obsessed as I am.

If you’d like to grab a copy, you can do so here, through my Amazon Associates link.

And if you’d like to keep up with the creators, you can do so here! I’ve link some Twitter accounts for you to follow.

Shawn Kittelsen, Eric Zawadzki, Jon Moisan, Pat Brosseau, Mike Spicer, Michael Garland, Carina Taylor, & Andres Juarez.

Thanks for reading! Hope you’re doing well and saying safe.

Blind the Eyes (Threads of Dreams #1) by K.A. Wiggins Review

3/5 Stars 287 pages
Published June 1st 2018 by Snowmelt & Stumps

Okay, anyone I know read this book? Because it gave me serious Annihilation vibes for most of it. Not only the stairway parts, but I feel like something about the writing just reminded me so much of that. The whole thing just really felt like a dream, and so did Annihilation. It might just be me alone thinking that though. Either way, I’m caught between rating this three or four stars, because although it was really interesting and unique, it just wasn’t my new favourite book. That doesn’t mean it wasn’t good, though.

Following a girl named Cole, at the beginning of the story we find her working surveillance. That means, in her world of the Refuge, all grey everything, everyone looking and acting the same, and never wanting or wishing or dreaming of anything, for fear the Mara will come and kill them. Very interesting and horrifying, this gory book had me constantly on my toes waiting for the next strike from the monsters, but I couldn’t really picture them. She works very hard to stay neutral in all aspects of her life after losing her memories and gaining a ghost named Cadence to the monsters not long ago, but it’s not enough. It seems like someone’s just out to get her.

Photo by Asep Syaeful Bahri on Pexels.com

After being called up to investigate something on a medical floor, she’s lost. Her ghost is always pestering her and telling her what to do, but she knows she needs to stay safe and ignore her. That is, until she’s headed up to investigate, and stopped by a boy who says he can get her out of Refuge. She doesn’t trust him and so she doesn’t go with him, but what’s waiting for her on the medical floor is unlike anything she could begin to imagine. She heads into a room to find the corpse of a woman, and when she touches her body, she’s pulled into a dream like experience and forced to live inside the memory that the Mara have created for the woman to drag her to them. What she’s just beginning to learn, however, is that she’s different. She can fight back against the monsters. She just doesn’t know how to.

Photo by Todd Trapani on Pexels.com

Something I really liked about Cole, is even when she’s lost to herself in the book, she’s still able to remember that she just wants to help people. I felt like I was reading this in a haze, and I imagine that’s how she felt as well. I both liked and disliked that aspect of it. Will I read the next book in the trilogy? If I can get my hands on it, I most likely would. But would I seek it out? I’m not sure. That’s just my opinion on the matter though. I really did think it was super unique, and I’m interested in seeing what happens next, but I’m just not in a huge rush to run out and grab it. I think if you liked Annihilation, you might like this, too.

If you’d like to grab a copy, you can do so here, through my Amazon Associates link.

And if you’d like to keep up with the author, you can follow them on Twitter here.

Thanks for reading! Hope you’re doing well and staying safe.

The Reader (Immortal Series #1) by M.K. Harkins Review

5/5 Stars 262 pages
Published July 2018

If you haven’t noticed, I’ve really been into these books about people with special powers, immortal or not. And this book has fit perfectly with that mood I’ve had lately. A story about people who can read minds, but with a few twists, one of which being that their people live in an underground compound build into a mountain. How amazing would that be to explore? I wouldn’t even mind living underground, if that were the case. This book was everything I wanted it to be and more.

Ann has lost her memory. Waking up on a beach with a face full of sand and a bullet wound, she’s devastated by her loss, and has no idea what to do from here. That is, until two guys show up to help her. Though she doesn’t know them, and a voice inside her head says that she can trust only one of them, she’s compelled to go with them to what they call their compound, a mansion built into the side of a mountain and surrounded by fake houses. Little does she know this is the easiest thing that will happen to her from now on.

Photo by Anthony Macajone on Pexels.com

Turns out, she’s a Reader, an immortal being who can read minds. And not only that, but she may just be The Lost One, a person that might as well be mythical for all anyone knows. A mix of the three immortal races, The Seers, who have been extinct due to war, The Jacks, an evil group bent on destroying the world to get what they want and who have to switch bodies every fifty years to keep their lives going, and of course The Readers. But she’s not convinced that she’s even a Reader, despite everyone around her knowing. That is, until she escapes from her amazing prison, and out into the real world where the humans are, and some of the Jacks are able to track her down. Will she regain her memory and put a stop to the evil group?

Photo by Mudassir Ali on Pexels.com

Like I said, this book was everything I wanted it to be and more. I wasn’t quite sure what I was getting myself into when I started it, but once I read the description again, I knew I was going to be hooked. This book is exciting and very mysterious, with characters I love and characters I hate, and really just a story that kept me guessing. I read it in less than a day, and once I found out that there was a second book to this duology, I knew I would have to get my hands on it. My favourite character was probably Lucy, because she’s just so nice and upbeat and just the perfect best friend. If you love books about people with mysterious powers and immortal bodies, than this is a book you should pick up next.

If you’d like to grab a copy, you can do so here through my Amazon Associates link.

Here’s a link to the author’s Twitter, if you’d like to keep up with them!

Thanks for reading! Hope you’re doing well and staying safe.

Planet Paradise by Jesse Lonergan Review

Not really sure what I was getting myself into, Planet Paradise is a really cute graphic novel, for what the story really is. I loved the art, and really disliked everyone but the main character, but I think that’s the point. Short and sweet, I really enjoyed this book.

4/5 Stars 128 pages
Published November 17th 2020 by Image Comics

Following a person on their way to Planet Paradise with a whole slew of tourists who have also been put to sleep in chambers on a rocket, something goes wrong and it crashes down to a planet inhabited by vicious dinosaurs. They’re forced to fend for themselves and not only save their own life, but also those left alive, including a very unfriendly ship captain. But things aren’t what they seem once everything seems back on it’s way up for our hero.

There isn’t really much to say about this book, it was a nice and chill read despite the story content. I really feel for the main character, and I hope that their vacation goes better for them, as well as the rest of their life. If you’d like something short and unique to fill the gap in your reading list, than you should definitely think about checking this book out.

If you’d like to grab a copy, you can do so here, through my Amazon Associates link.

Thanks for reading! Hope you’re doing well and staying safe.

Anathema (Cloud Prophet Trilogy #1) by Megg Jensen Review

5/5 Stars 206 pages
Published February 5th 2011 by Createspace

Though I’ve had this book for a really long time just sitting collecting imaginary dust on my ereader, I only just got around to reading it. And man, I wish I read it sooner. Way different than anything I’ve read lately, books like these have really brought me to love the fantasy and magical power genre, something I didn’t used to enjoy. I can’t wait to check out the second book in the trilogy.

Living as a slave her entire life has been hard, and life is about to get even harder when on the morning of her fifteenth birthday, with her branding ceremony just around the corner, Reychel’s best friend Ivy is missing from their bed. That means Reychel’s going to have to go through the traumatizing ceremony not only alone, but that she’s lost her only friend. She tries to go about the day like normal, with the new girl instead of Ivy helping her shave her head and in turn, she shaves her head too, and then goes about her chores. But Reychel’s different, and her owner knows it. He calls her into his study every day to gaze at the clouds, and tell him stories.

Photo by Dapo Abideen on Pexels.com

She’s horribly hurt and confused by the situation, until she finds a double sided coin with the word Anathema on the back. That gives her the information that she needs, now knowing that her friend hasn’t left her, but was instead kidnapped. That doesn’t help her personal situation, though. Until they come for her, too. That’s when she learns that the people kidnapping the slaves aren’t doing it to hurt them, but to help them. And that they only free the gifted slaves. But Reychel’s confused, because although everyone says that she’s gifted like them, she hasn’t the slightest idea what her gift is, and she’s horribly worried that she’ll never find it out.

Photo by Phil on Pexels.com

One thing I was worried about reading this book was that because the main character is only fifteen, that I wouldn’t be able to really get into the story like I can with other ones, but that wasn’t even a problem. I slipped right into the background and sat there until the end of the book, when I couldn’t help but want more. And I haven’t stopped thinking about it since. This was not only exciting, but also mysterious in the best way, and I really couldn’t get enough. I think if you like books about beings with tough lives but also magical powers, and trying to change the way that the world works, then this is a perfect choice for your next read.

If you’d like to grab a copy, you can do so here through my Amazon Associates link.

And if you’d like to keep up with the author, you can follow them on Twitter here!

Thanks for reading! I hope you’re doing well and staying safe.

The Simpsons: A Cultural History by Moritz Fink Review

4/5 Stars 264 pages
Published June 19th 2019 by Rowman & Littlefield Publishers

Who doesn’t love The Simpsons? I’m not sure I personally know anyone like that, even after thirty seasons. And if they are, well, they haven’t made themselves known. As someone with two The Simpsons based tattoos, I know them like the back of my hand, and they’re often part of my anxious tv watching, as I’ve been watching since I was a little kid. They’re something I know, they’re kind of predictable, especially when you’re watching old re-runs over and over again, and they’re not very stressful, usually. That’s why I picked up this book to read next.

Inside this book is basically essays dissecting almost all of the main characters, certain episodes, comparing things to real life, and also just really talking about the show in general. How it all came together, why it continues to be successful after more than thirty seasons, and really why it has such a cult following. You really get to know everything inside and out as the author knows it, and you learn a lot. And that’s why I liked this book. Though it kind of reads like a textbook at times, I really feel like I got to know the show a little better after reading this, and that wasn’t something that I thought was possible.

If you’re like me, you know the episodes very well. What I don’t know, however, is the people behind the show, and a lot of the old references to life events, as I’m not close to being 31 years old, like the show is. The show had already had almost ten seasons by the time I came along, so there’s a lot I missed just because I wasn’t around yet. What I found most interesting about this book was how the show connects people around the world without even knowing it. Also that Sam Simon basically is just a name on the title screen. Who knew?

Overall, if you’re looking for a deep dive on one of your favourite shows, than this is the book for you. A pretty easy read, I was able to sink right into it, and I think you would be able to, too. I’m trying to get back into reading more non-fiction books, and this was a great start to that goal.

If you’d like to grab a copy you can do so here, through my Amazon Associates link.

And here’s a link to the author’s Twitter, if you’d like to keep up with them.

Thanks for reading! Hope you’re doing well.

Colors of Immortality (Colors of Immortality #1) by J.M. Muller Review

Honestly, I’ve very conflicted with this book. I love the idea of the story, but I feel like the first half of the book fell short, the characters seemed incomplete, and they kind of just spent a lot of time lashing out at each other, and that wasn’t very fun to read. But the second half, oh man. I couldn’t get enough. Once it moved out of the normal daily life kind of situations and into the supernatural deaths and immortality and powers kind of stuff, it really blossomed.

3/5 Stars 270 pages
Published July 29th 2016 by BookBaby

Following a teenage boy named Daniel, the story starts off with an argument between him and his newly ex girlfriend. She’s been drugged and molested at a party, and he doesn’t believe her. This is why I initially really didn’t like the book. She’s hysterical, and he’s just mad that she slept with someone else. He doesn’t care about what really happened, why it happened, and how it happened. I almost put down the book because of that. It’s really insensitive. I think there could have been a way better version of this story without that. Anyways, he goes on to work, we learn about his sad back story with his absent parents, and why he lives with his grandma. Then he’s supposed to go on a hiking date with his best friend and two girls, but when he arrives at his friends house, they’ve already left with his cousin. He’s mad, but it’s for the best. That’s when things really start to change.

Photo by Matheus Bertelli on Pexels.com

It turns out that the meeting was a trap. Supernatural beings known as Veloures, had lured his best friend out hoping to get him, but instead killed his best friend and turned him into one of them. That’s what they want to do with him. So when he goes out looking for his friend, he finds someone else, someone not human, and someone who wants to hurt him. And that’s when he meets Fantasia, instant love of his life, super beautiful goddess of a girl with healing powers. She takes him to her cave and explains everything, and gives him a choice that no one else will, become like them, or leave his life behind and run, and try to forget about everything that she’s told him, and that he’s seen.

Photo by Irina Iriser on Pexels.com

This is why I liked the book. The supernatural beings were so different than any others I’ve read about, but the beginning of the book is just so hurtful and mean I really couldn’t get over it. I didn’t like the main character very much because of his insensitivity, and I mean, I get that he’s a teenage boy and they have their ego to worry about, but I think that was really pushing it. Like I said earlier, I think that the first half could have been rewritten in a way that it matched up more to the second half, and I would have absolutely loved it. That’s just me though. I might be a little too sensitive to topics like that. I would recommend it to people with a strong stomach who like young adult books about supernatural beings, and their afterlife. The book itself isn’t particularly gory or violent, until the last chapter of the book, but that being said, the last chapter was the most exciting and heart wrenching for me.

If you’d like to grab a copy, you can do so here, through my Amazon Associates link!

Here’s a link to the author’s Twitter, if you’d like to keep up with them!

Thanks for reading! Hope you have a great day, and you’re staying safe.

Siena (The Forestfolk #1) by Zoe Blessing Review

A bit different than the usual paranormal books I read, Siena is a story of a fifteen year old girl who’s only known captivity her whole life. As a child, she discovered her ability to heal, and after her loud mouth half brother blabbed about it, her mother was executed for hiding her secret, and she’s been a slave ever since. She often wonders if this is all life has for her.

5/5 Stars 186 pages
Published April 21st 2017 by Pennydragon Press

Told through the first person viewpoint, we really get the nitty gritty of Siena’s life and slavery in the beginning of the book. Pushed around by everyone in her compound, they use her powers and don’t care about her health or safety. She knows why people keep their abilities a secret, being called an horrible names. Little does she know that everyone else is just jealous of her power. 

One night, her compound is raided by a neighbouring one while their warriors are out scouting. They take down everyone in their path. Except for Siena, who narrowly escapes with her life. She finds a new home and a new life with the Forestfolk, originally a refuge camp in the middle of the woods. They accept her and her gift with welcoming arms. But bad things are happening to the people that were captured from her original camp, and she can’t stand around and let it be. She has to do something about it.

Photo by Dominika Roseclay on Pexels.com

I’m going to be honest, I wasn’t really sure what I was getting into with this book, but once I started it I completely devoured it, finishing it in just a few hours. I couldn’t get enough. The kindness in the hearts of these characters, even though they’re fictional, gives me hope for the people in our real lives. It’s a story of blossoming in the right conditions, and doing whatever you can to stay there. And if something bad happens, just keep going, and it’ll be okay eventually. You’ll find people who love you for you, and I think that’s the moral of the story.

If you’re looking for something very different in the way of magical powers and the woods, then this is the book for you. I can’t wait to get my hands on the second book, and really just suck myself into that one as well. This book really taught me a lesson that I hope stays with me for a while, if not forever, at least.

If you’d like to grab a copy, you can do so here, through my Amazon Associates link.

And if you’d like to keep up with the author, you can here on Twitter!

Thanks for reading! Hope you’re doing well and staying safe.