Hello I Want to Die Please Fix Me: Depression in the First Person by Anna Mehler Paperny Review

4/5 Stars 352 pages
Published August 6th 2019 by Random House Canada

Now here’s a book I’ve been trying to read since it came out. A tough subject to really read about, depression is something that has haunted almost everyone at one point. Whether it’s when you’re younger or when you’re older, whether it’s because of things you don’t think are that important or because of some kind of life changing event, it’s debilitating, and continues to be debilitating because people just don’t know that much about it, and how to treat it. And that’s really just the problem with it. It’s not that there’s something wrong with the people that have it, it’s that there’s no real sure way to treat it and get rid of it.

This book explores not only the authors own experiences with depression, but also many other people that they’ve interviewed, as well as doctors that have tried every method in the book, and in some cases trying their own forms of radical treatment to try and get rid of it in their patients, for good. Some people have good reactions to drugs that they prescribe, while others, like me, are either unresponsive or they make things worse. So the doctors turn to in patient treatment, or in a few cases, electric shock therapy, and in even fewer cases, brain surgery. But why is it so difficult to treat? Because it’s different in every person. And there’s just not enough funding or interest in getting rid of depression all together to figure out how to come up with a way to figure out a sure way to treat each and every person who has it, the first time. And that’s what the problem is.

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Though there are a few parts in this book that were really hard for me to read, I was persistent, and I’m really glad that I was. Like my depression. I learned a lot from this book, and I think it was a really good addition to my small amount of non fiction books that I’ve read this year. I really respect the author for being able to talk about this stuff, for collection all the interviews in a book, and for putting a lot of things I’ve wondered about into words. Like how doctors sometimes seem uncaring and cold about it. How hard it is for patients to really go to the doctor and tell them that they’re thinking of, or planning on, killing themselves, because of the stigma that comes along with it. Or like how drastically different inpatient treatment is from the real world. How harsh and cold it can be. And how something that’s supposed to be making you better really can do the opposite, and cause you to not trust any doctor for the rest of your life, in some cases.

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It took a while for me to get through this book, but mostly because there was just so much for me to process. I didn’t want to speed through it like I usually do with books, because I wanted to actually learn things from this and one day, if and when my depression comes back, I can remember this book and remember that I’m not alone, even though it feels like it. I really recommend this book to anyone who knows anyone with depression, anyone who suffers from it, and that’s really that. I recommend it to everyone. Definitely check it out if you get the chance.

If you’d like to grab a copy, you can do so here, with my link through Amazon Associates.

And if you’d like to keep up with the author, you can do so here!

Thanks for reading! Hope you’re doing well and staying safe.

Night Watch (Soul Reader #1) by Annie Anderson Book Blitz & Excerpt

Night Watch
Annie Anderson
(Soul Reader, #1)
Publication date: November 17th 2020
Genres: Adult, Paranormal, Urban Fantasy

Waking up at the foot of your own grave is no picnic… especially when you can’t remember how you got there.

Cursed with powers she can’t name, Sloane Cabot has vowed to catch the Rogue who turned her into a monster and killed her family. Too bad a broodingly hot mage is bound to keep her on the straight and narrow.

Whether she likes it or not…

Goodreads / Amazon

EXCERPT:

“Thomas warned me about this, you know,” Bastian began, his voice pitched low, his booted feet striding close but not piercing my bubble.

I kept my gaze latched onto his feet and refused to look up. If I caught sight of his neck, of his blood pulsing in that lovely vein, I’d lose it. I wasn’t hungry yet and I wanted to keep it that way.

I cleared my throat, an action that took far too much effort and hurt for some reason. My throat was dry. Why was it so dry? “Warned you about what?”

“He said that, in time, I would want to be bitten. That the thought of you hungry or in pain would make me want to serve myself up so you didn’t suffer. That it was dangerous and blissful and would likely cause you to leave us.”

His feet moved closer, piercing my bubble. The heat of him washed over me, even though he was a few feet away.

I shook my head, which I instantly regretted because blood loss was a thing and I was losing a lot of it, the healing process taking far too long. Booth must have hit an artery.

“I don’t want to be tied to anyone. I don’t want a home. I don’t want friends.” It was a lie—a whole mountain of lies—but it was the truth, too. I didn’t want a tie to someone who was going to leave me. I didn’t want a home if I was going to lose it. I didn’t want friends that would die on me.

“Too bad.”

Author Bio:

Annie Anderson is a military wife and United States Air Force veteran. Originally from Dallas, Texas, she is a southern girl at heart, but has lived all over the US and abroad. As soon as the military stops moving her family around, she’ll settle on a state, but for now she enjoys being a nomad with her husband, two daughters, an old man of a dog, and a young pup that makes life… interesting.

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Heart Attack, Vol. 1: Against the Wall by Shawn Kittelsen, Eric Zawadzki, Jon Moisan, Pat Brosseau, Mike Spicer, Michael Garland, Carina Taylor, & Andres Juarez Review

5/5 Stars 160 pages
Published August 4th 2020 by Image Comics

Do you love X-Men just as much as I do? People who have special powers each as unique as they are? What about a world where they’re segregated from the people who don’t have powers and the government demonizes them? Than this book will be perfect for you. Not only do they have their own powers, but occasionally, they can combo their powers together, creating even stronger ones. Don’t expect this book to be completely straightforward though, because there are some crazy twists in the story even I didn’t expect.

At the beginning, we see a young man and woman in an alley, making graffiti. Pretty harmless, right? Well not to everyone. Because special Variant officers come and take them down, treating the one they catch as a hardened criminal, and taking her far away and not letting her see the light of day. She’s missing, and the only person that can help her is Charlie, the young man who was with her, who secretly films the assault on Nona and uploads it for the world to see. But is he doing it for the right reasons?

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He then joins up with a team of women who are determined to change the world, and how people see and treat Variants, the people with powers. But it’s going to be  a long road before they get justice, and before the officers even begin to see them as people. But they’re just as much people as anyone else, most of them barely having any powers at all. The world needs to change, and they’re going to do whatever they can to do it.

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This book was one that I knew as soon as I started it, I was going to be obsessed with. I love the art, it’s so cartoony and amazing and it just fits the story so well, even the violent parts that aren’t so innocent. I also love the bright colours in this, as a girl with coloured hair, I always love a main character with brightly coloured hair like me. I couldn’t get enough of it. And I can’t wait to check out the next volume. Definitely check it out if you get the chance, and even if you don’t think you would love it, I think you should just try it out. I’m sure you’ll be as obsessed as I am.

If you’d like to grab a copy, you can do so here, through my Amazon Associates link.

And if you’d like to keep up with the creators, you can do so here! I’ve link some Twitter accounts for you to follow.

Shawn Kittelsen, Eric Zawadzki, Jon Moisan, Pat Brosseau, Mike Spicer, Michael Garland, Carina Taylor, & Andres Juarez.

Thanks for reading! Hope you’re doing well and saying safe.

Blind the Eyes (Threads of Dreams #1) by K.A. Wiggins Review

3/5 Stars 287 pages
Published June 1st 2018 by Snowmelt & Stumps

Okay, anyone I know read this book? Because it gave me serious Annihilation vibes for most of it. Not only the stairway parts, but I feel like something about the writing just reminded me so much of that. The whole thing just really felt like a dream, and so did Annihilation. It might just be me alone thinking that though. Either way, I’m caught between rating this three or four stars, because although it was really interesting and unique, it just wasn’t my new favourite book. That doesn’t mean it wasn’t good, though.

Following a girl named Cole, at the beginning of the story we find her working surveillance. That means, in her world of the Refuge, all grey everything, everyone looking and acting the same, and never wanting or wishing or dreaming of anything, for fear the Mara will come and kill them. Very interesting and horrifying, this gory book had me constantly on my toes waiting for the next strike from the monsters, but I couldn’t really picture them. She works very hard to stay neutral in all aspects of her life after losing her memories and gaining a ghost named Cadence to the monsters not long ago, but it’s not enough. It seems like someone’s just out to get her.

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After being called up to investigate something on a medical floor, she’s lost. Her ghost is always pestering her and telling her what to do, but she knows she needs to stay safe and ignore her. That is, until she’s headed up to investigate, and stopped by a boy who says he can get her out of Refuge. She doesn’t trust him and so she doesn’t go with him, but what’s waiting for her on the medical floor is unlike anything she could begin to imagine. She heads into a room to find the corpse of a woman, and when she touches her body, she’s pulled into a dream like experience and forced to live inside the memory that the Mara have created for the woman to drag her to them. What she’s just beginning to learn, however, is that she’s different. She can fight back against the monsters. She just doesn’t know how to.

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Something I really liked about Cole, is even when she’s lost to herself in the book, she’s still able to remember that she just wants to help people. I felt like I was reading this in a haze, and I imagine that’s how she felt as well. I both liked and disliked that aspect of it. Will I read the next book in the trilogy? If I can get my hands on it, I most likely would. But would I seek it out? I’m not sure. That’s just my opinion on the matter though. I really did think it was super unique, and I’m interested in seeing what happens next, but I’m just not in a huge rush to run out and grab it. I think if you liked Annihilation, you might like this, too.

If you’d like to grab a copy, you can do so here, through my Amazon Associates link.

And if you’d like to keep up with the author, you can follow them on Twitter here.

Thanks for reading! Hope you’re doing well and staying safe.

We Don’t Lie Anymore by Julie Johnson Cover Reveal

We Don’t Lie Anymore
Julie Johnson
(Julie Johnson)
Publication date: December 8th 2020
Genres: Contemporary, New Adult, Romance

“We were never just friends…”

One year ago, I gave my heart to my best friend. He threw it in the dirt and walked out of my life without a backward glance.

Or so I thought.

When our orbits cross once more, everything I thought I knew about my relationship with Archer Reyes is turned upside down. The captivating boy I fell in love with is gone; in his place stands a haunted man with secrets burning in his eyes.

Secrets I’d do just about anything to uncover.

It’s been 365 days since I told my best friend I loved him.
365 days since he didn’t say it back.
365 days since he lied straight to my face.

WE DON’T LIE ANYMORE is a breathtaking story of forgiveness, friendship, and the fight for true love… It is the second installment in THE DON’T DUET, directly following the events of WE DON’T TALK ANYMORE.

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Author Bio:

JULIE JOHNSON (born July 3, 1991) is a twenty-something Boston native and USA Today bestselling author of more than a dozen contemporary romance novels. When she’s not writing, Julie can most often be found adding stamps to her passport, drinking too much coffee, striving to conquer her Netflix queue, and Instagramming pictures of her dog. (Follow her: @author_julie)

She published her debut novel LIKE GRAVITY in August 2013, just before her senior year of college, and she’s never looked back. Since, she has published more than a dozen other novels, including the bestselling BOSTON LOVE STORY series and THE GIRL DUET. Her books have appeared on Kindle and iTunes Bestseller lists around the world, as well as in AdWeek, Publishers Weekly, and USA Today.

Be on the lookout for her new series, THE FORBIDDEN ROYALS TRILOGY, now available at all e-retailers!

You can find Julie on Facebook or contact her on her website http://www.juliejohnsonbooks.com. Sometimes, when she can figure out how Twitter works, she tweets from @AuthorJulie. For major book news and updates, subscribe to Julie’s newsletter: http://eepurl.com/bnWtHH

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The Reader (Immortal Series #1) by M.K. Harkins Review

5/5 Stars 262 pages
Published July 2018

If you haven’t noticed, I’ve really been into these books about people with special powers, immortal or not. And this book has fit perfectly with that mood I’ve had lately. A story about people who can read minds, but with a few twists, one of which being that their people live in an underground compound build into a mountain. How amazing would that be to explore? I wouldn’t even mind living underground, if that were the case. This book was everything I wanted it to be and more.

Ann has lost her memory. Waking up on a beach with a face full of sand and a bullet wound, she’s devastated by her loss, and has no idea what to do from here. That is, until two guys show up to help her. Though she doesn’t know them, and a voice inside her head says that she can trust only one of them, she’s compelled to go with them to what they call their compound, a mansion built into the side of a mountain and surrounded by fake houses. Little does she know this is the easiest thing that will happen to her from now on.

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Turns out, she’s a Reader, an immortal being who can read minds. And not only that, but she may just be The Lost One, a person that might as well be mythical for all anyone knows. A mix of the three immortal races, The Seers, who have been extinct due to war, The Jacks, an evil group bent on destroying the world to get what they want and who have to switch bodies every fifty years to keep their lives going, and of course The Readers. But she’s not convinced that she’s even a Reader, despite everyone around her knowing. That is, until she escapes from her amazing prison, and out into the real world where the humans are, and some of the Jacks are able to track her down. Will she regain her memory and put a stop to the evil group?

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Like I said, this book was everything I wanted it to be and more. I wasn’t quite sure what I was getting myself into when I started it, but once I read the description again, I knew I was going to be hooked. This book is exciting and very mysterious, with characters I love and characters I hate, and really just a story that kept me guessing. I read it in less than a day, and once I found out that there was a second book to this duology, I knew I would have to get my hands on it. My favourite character was probably Lucy, because she’s just so nice and upbeat and just the perfect best friend. If you love books about people with mysterious powers and immortal bodies, than this is a book you should pick up next.

If you’d like to grab a copy, you can do so here through my Amazon Associates link.

Here’s a link to the author’s Twitter, if you’d like to keep up with them!

Thanks for reading! Hope you’re doing well and staying safe.

Counterfeit Lover by J.C. Farmer Blog Tour & Excerpt

Counterfeit Lover
J.C. Farmer
Published by: Acorn Publishing
Publication date: November 24th 2020
Genres: Adult, Romance, Thriller

Darrin Clark is an impoverished young man, madly in love with his long-time friend Janie. He is desperate for a job, and any way to win Janie’s affections. Then a Hollywood studio promises to make him a movie star—if he will submit to a face-modifying procedure they are developing.

Darrin’s love overcomes his fear, and he allows the movie studio to alter his face. Soon his dreams come true. He is extraordinarily handsome, rich, and popular, full of the confidence he needs to earn Janie’s love. Yet, changing faces doesn’t seem enough, and the studio wants him to sacrifice more of his identity than just his appearance.

His plan to win Janie’s heart becomes complicated when she unexpectedly joins the cast and changes her face too. Now a gorgeous star, she’s pursued by prominent, powerful men, and beneath the glitz and glamour, Darrin finds himself in a world of death and deceit, where anyone can have any face.

Several of his friends have been murdered by a mysterious killer, and the ability to alter appearances seems to make the criminal invincible. Soon, Darrin abandons his pursuit of Janie, simply hoping to keep her alive.The only way to outsmart the ruthless villain is to risk everything. How drastic a transformation is Darrin willing to make for love?

Goodreads / Amazon / Barnes & Noble

 

Author Bio:

Jerome Connelly Farmer has had a successful career as an engineer, inventor and technology consultant. He has three engineering degrees from Stanford and an MBA from the Anderson School. He has several patents and spent many years managing engineering teams and consulting for high-tech firms, movie studios, and Fortune 500 companies.

J.C. was born and raised in Ann Arbor, MI. He is an airplane pilot, sailor, scuba diver and avid traveler; he has explored Tibet, camped in the Australian outback, canoed through the Amazon River, and retraced segments of Ernest Shackleton’s famous rescue in Antarctic. J. C.’s passion for wildlife photography has taken him to all seven continents, including searching for Komodo Dragons in Indonesia, wild macaws in the Peruvian jungle, endangered species in the Galapagos Islands, Duck-billed Platypus in Australia, and White Rhinoceros in Botswana.

J.C. is the author of the romantic thriller Counterfeit Lover and the children’s book Santa’s Dashboard. Writing combines his love for adventure, invention and exploration.

When he is not traveling, J.C. lives in Solana Beach, CA.

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And here’s an excerpt from the book, enjoy!

“You want me to put my head in that?”

The strange machine boasted robotic arms, needles and lasers, and it resembled a torture device designed by Dr. Seuss. I stared at the man who thought I’d be crazy enough to stick my head in it.

“It’ll make you rich and famous,” Dutch Hollander said. “Don’t be a wimp. You’ve been a chicken your entire life.”

The insult hurt, especially coming from one of the most powerful people in Hollywood. Sure, I was a failure in many ways, but he’d picked the quality I hated most about myself. Cowardice.

Dutch and I were alone in a plain-looking white trailer at a studio in Burbank. The trailer was empty except for the bizarre contraption. I pretended to examine its hydraulic arms, wishing I could ask Janie for advice. She had an audition today, and I wondered how it was going.

“This is the chance of a lifetime, Darrin,” the studio chief prodded. “Just stick your damn head in the machine.”

I wanted to leave. For two years, I’d been desperate for anyone in Hollywood to notice me. Anyone. Now I had the full attention of the president of Digital Impact, which recently became the world’s biggest movie studio.

This was my second audition. The previous week, I’d read a few lines from various scripts in Dutch’s lavish office. I’d been so intimidated, I could barely function. Today, Dutch had escorted me to a sound stage filled with rows of identical white eight-wheeled trailers. We stood inside one of the trailers, discussing the strange machine it contained.

Prescott “Dutch” Hollander looked exactly as he did on TV. He was about fifty, portly, with a bulbous nose and a resemblance to W.C. Fields. A billionaire thanks to a streak of blockbuster movies starting in 2020, he wore an elegant pin-striped suit with suspenders and gripped a cigar in his right hand.

I was the complete opposite: twenty-one, thin, cheaply dressed and penniless.

“When we researched you for this part, I was shocked that any man could be so gutless,” Dutch said, goading me. “Your life reveals a relentless pursuit of cowardliness.”

“Perhaps I have dreams besides being famous.”

“Shit,” he snickered. “We know you don’t give a crap about being a movie star. You don’t care about acting. All you want to do is impress that girl, what’s-her-name . . .” Dutch flipped open the neatly-organized file he held. “Janie Norman. You moved to LA to be near her and became an actor to impress her. Yet, you haven’t gotten a single part, and you’re too scared to try to ask her out. She must be really impressed.”

Fuck you. “You don’t know anything about me.” He knew everything about me.

Planet Paradise by Jesse Lonergan Review

Not really sure what I was getting myself into, Planet Paradise is a really cute graphic novel, for what the story really is. I loved the art, and really disliked everyone but the main character, but I think that’s the point. Short and sweet, I really enjoyed this book.

4/5 Stars 128 pages
Published November 17th 2020 by Image Comics

Following a person on their way to Planet Paradise with a whole slew of tourists who have also been put to sleep in chambers on a rocket, something goes wrong and it crashes down to a planet inhabited by vicious dinosaurs. They’re forced to fend for themselves and not only save their own life, but also those left alive, including a very unfriendly ship captain. But things aren’t what they seem once everything seems back on it’s way up for our hero.

There isn’t really much to say about this book, it was a nice and chill read despite the story content. I really feel for the main character, and I hope that their vacation goes better for them, as well as the rest of their life. If you’d like something short and unique to fill the gap in your reading list, than you should definitely think about checking this book out.

If you’d like to grab a copy, you can do so here, through my Amazon Associates link.

Thanks for reading! Hope you’re doing well and staying safe.

Heart Stopper (Rebels of Rushmore #1) by Michelle Hercules Cover Reveal

Heart Stopper
Michelle Hercules
(Rebels of Rushmore, #1)
Publication date: December 2nd 2020
Genres: Contemporary, New Adult, Romance

Troy Alexander is sex on a stick and every girl’s dream at John Rushmore University. He’s also the bane of my existence.

Our meet-cute wasn’t exactly cute. He called me a nerd, and I accused him of slacking off on the field. Now, we have to live together.

I’m supposed to try to play nice to keep a roof over my head. Not in my nature. Our arrangement could be a living hell, but slowly, I realize the worst thing he ever did wasn’t calling me names. It was making me see there’s more to him under the surface. And now, I’m screwed.

*Heart Stopper is an enemies-to-lovers college sports romance filled with banter, pranks, and off the charts chemistry that will make you swoon.

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Photography: Michelle Lancaster @lanefotograf
Cover Model: Lochie Carey @lochie_carey

Author Bio:

USA Today bestselling author Michelle Hercules always knew creative arts were her calling but not in a million years did she think she would write a novel. With a background in fashion design she thought she would follow that path. But one day, out of the blue, she had an idea for a book. One page turned into ten pages, ten pages turned into a hundred, and before she knew, her first book, The Prophecy of Arcadia, was born.

Michelle Hercules resides in The Netherlands with her husband and daughter. She is currently working on the Legends of Gattica series.

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